| (no subject) |
[Apr. 4th, 2012|02:07 pm] |
This theater is just mask of my sanity. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 22nd, 2012|10:19 pm] |
( stochastic behavior in deterministic system )))))))))))) )
still connected, still making sense |
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| ---reading--- |
[Feb. 26th, 2012|03:28 am] |
Any effort that has self-glorification as its final endpoint is bound to end in disaster. Now we are paying the price. When you try to climb a mountain to prove how big you are, you almost never make it. And even if you do it's a hollow victory. In order to sustain the victory you have to prove yourself again and again in some other way, and again and again, driven forever to fill a false image, haunted by the fear that the image is not true and someone will find out. That's never the way.
(Robert M. Pirsig - Zen and The Art Of Motorcycle Maintenance) |
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| ó g n a t n á t á s |
[Feb. 23rd, 2012|11:27 pm] |
And the sky is filled with light
Can you see it?
All the black is really white
If you believe it
And the longing that you feel
You know none of this is real
(NIN - In This Twilight) |
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| : : > ::::: |
[Feb. 14th, 2012|04:41 am] |
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Take a litle walk to the edge of town
Go across the tracks
Where the viaduct looms,
Like a bird of doom
As it shifts and cracks
Where secrets lie in the border fires,
In the humming wires
Hey man, you know
You're never coming back
You're one microscopic cog
In his catastrophic plan
Designed and directed by
His red right hand
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| << |
[Dec. 28th, 2011|07:46 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | archive | ] |
| [ | muzik |
| | moving through time | ] |
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“Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.”
Confucius |
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[Dec. 27th, 2011|05:12 am] |
i n t e r p l a y
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| crazy clown time |
[Dec. 23rd, 2011|01:57 am] |
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All right
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People say I'm heavy
They don't know what I hide
.
.
Don't try to reach me
'Cause I'll tear up your mind
I've seen the future
And I've left it behind
______________________
You're gonna go insane
______________________ |
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| Stone's Gone Up |
[Dec. 1st, 2011|02:54 pm] |
I feel like moving mountains.
+ soundtrack
___ |
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| He must give the void its colors |
[Nov. 28th, 2011|07:49 pm] |
Warning: If you are reading this then this warning is for you. Every word you read of this useless fine print is another second off your life. Don't you have other things to do? Is your life so empty that you honestly can't think of a better way to spend these moments? Or are you so impressed with authority that you give respect and credence to all that claim it? Do you read everything you're supposed to read? Do you think every thing you're supposed to think? Buy what you're told to want? Get out of your apartment. Meet a member of the opposite sex. Stop the excessive shopping and masturbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you're alive. If you don't claim your humanity you will become a statistic. You have been warned- Tyler.
"If you are going to try, go all the way. Otherwise don't even start. This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives, jobs. And Maybe your mind. It could mean not eating for three or four days. It could mean freezing on a park bench. It could mean jail. It could mean derision. It could mean mockery, isolation. Isolation is the gift. All others are a test of your endurance. Of how much you really want to do it. And you'll do it, despite rejection in the worst odds. You will be alone with the gods. It's the only good fight there is."
(Henry Chinaski) |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 21st, 2011|11:26 pm] |
| [ | muzik |
| | scott walker - jolson and jones | ] |
Whatever it expresses -
even destruction and ruin -
the artistic image
is by definition an embodiment of hope,
it is inspired by faith.
Artistic creation
is by definition a denial of death.
therefore it is optimistic,
even if in an ultimate sense the artist is tragic.
And so there can never be
optimistic artists or pessimistic artists.
There can only be talent and mediocrity.
A. Tarkovsky |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 21st, 2011|05:01 pm] |
Spell breaker.
Spell maker. |
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| Strange and Unproductive Thinking |
[Nov. 18th, 2011|03:43 am] |
Bearing all the aforementioned dialogues we discover the possibilities of
the curve towards progressive behavior and the ultimate realization of the
goal of evolution, which grants the benefits of added awareness with
unlimited boundness of happiness, also known as bliss, which is a result of
the laws which govern physical behavior merging with the highest levels of
spirit, and together manifesting the magical and mystical level of cosmic
awareness, becoming one with the longing for complete surrender to the
higher self, which has potentially been waiting these long eons of time,
and in fact sometimes has been dipping into a state of semi-sleep or
unconsciousness, bordering on complete absence of thought.
Specifically, the areas concerning the new futuristic thinking have to do
with several abstract, somewhat hidden, emotional tendencies which lead one
to believe that the consequences of interaction between the positive and
negative forces are producing a vital link between the subconscious and
superconscious minds, which therefore can only be considered as actual
structures with two separate and distinctly different qualities.
As we have seen, when one or more intensely feeling energies become
associated with the higher levels of perceptible phenomenon, and these new
forms are then instantly acted upon by the two minds previously discussed,
and brand new associations are given over with resulting problems sorting
out the new strains of emotional and physical qualities we see cropping up
in schools and places of business across the country, and in the cities
which of course have the added complications of the much-argued-over
proposition that one cannot tolerate the existence of two or more intensely
opposing ideas at one point in time.
Others may find it easier to say "however," and that thought alone is one
which troubles many of us here who have for so long held the light up on
the words which brought meaning to us concerning the amount of effort it
takes to ignite a certain process leading one to the knowledge of the truce
behind the alternating essence which is unending without actually
beginning, and in those words of course is the key to beginning a long
journey toward understanding which, as we have learned, is something for
which each human being cries out, cupping his hands over the mouth.
Sometimes in the evenings a feeling of the type which haunts young children
in the forest will come in on a dark wind, and all the light will fade
leaving a low sound penetrating the eyes, which follow the dark shapes
running for safe nests just out of reach of small white teeth and noses
filled with dirt going up over the mountains covered with tall trees and
green needles and red bark with pitch oozing out into the air, which dries
it on the surface causing it to become crusty which allows for the
protection of all that lies within the crust, for it will now remain liquid
and hold itself remaining in a state close to that of the pure essence
which will remind us of home, which will remind us of the red cookie-jar,
and the smiles dancing around in the golden afternoons, while the pipe
puffs out small clouds of smoke from the mouth of the father with an axe to
cut wood growing on the tall mountains.
In order to assure that the fundamental qualities inherent in the solutions
to modern philosophical questions are accurate, the first and foremost
consideration lies in the field of abstractions associated with the loss of
nature, and with them the interaction of the primary forces of life itself
which have now been proven beyond a shadow of a doubt to have their basis
in the field of the absolute in the vacuum state bringing to mind that
there has been a reversal of sorts of the age-old phrase, "You can't get
something from nothing." As we have seen this kind of thinking which has
been going on since the beginning of time is just a smoke-screen necessary
to block almost all truthful inquiries for centuries following, and it is
with this also on our minds that we see that the initial thinking on a
subject is critical to all that follows, and can be an excellent partner to
the dark and evil forces which would have us living forever in darkness and
confusion, refusing even to acknowledge that we even existed, or that there
was such a thing as a bad tooth, or a tooth-ache.
Bringing our discussion to the realm of practical considerations, it is
interesting to note the possibilities of dental hygiene and the remarkable
idea of a world free of tooth-decay and all other problems associated with
the teeth, tongue, or oral cavity, which would, in fact, become a prime
motivator for a certain disappearance of fears associated with pain
connected with dental applications, and even the idea that plaque could
appear upon the surface of the teeth, and the negative occurrences which
follow such as the hideous odors emitted from the oral cavity and the
discolorations and the resulted perforation of the once beautiful mental
images, and the possibility of the breaking of relationships based upon the
idea of negative distortion of the mouth, for teeth, while not necessarily
considered one of the primary building blocks of happiness, can in fact
become a small sore, festering and transferring negative energies to the
once quiet and peaceful mind, giving it over to strange and unproductive
thinking.
Strange and Unproductive Thinking, Crazy Clown Time, David Lynch 2011
I would like too rather recommend going to see your dentist than attending psychotherapy.
Works perfectly.
:) |
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| Good day today |
[Nov. 13th, 2011|09:05 pm] |
| [ | muzik |
| | david lynch obviously | ] |
So tired of fearing, so tired of dark
Send me an angel, save me
I wanna have a good day today
... |
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| -_- personal note |
[Sep. 21st, 2011|01:28 pm] |
Yesterday, you took me by surprise, I m still touched by that. I am trying desperately to think of something to make you happy. To not let it all fall apart. There is not much time left...
I know.
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| theme for thought |
[Sep. 14th, 2011|05:14 pm] |
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( I've been working on videos recently, stay tuned )
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| Let the waves have their day |
[Sep. 6th, 2011|01:16 pm] |
Just arrived to another hotel room and went to look out of the window to see what am I going to see. It was early morning and the sky was still and black, then I saw something that looked like a falling star or rather comet flying across the horizon. I wanted to make a wish and at that moment I realized it is a burning plane falling down. It was all burning like it came out of the sun, it was not wrapped up in flames, rather still burn. I didnt see how it crashed, it was too far away, but I heard the last screams of dying passengers.
from the dream diary, 6.9.2011
What do the waves have to say now? |
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| the more darkness you can gather up, the more light you can see too |
[Aug. 29th, 2011|08:09 pm] |
I like doing this - taking photographs and then playing with them in Photoshop. Sadly, I dont have enough patience to develop them in the dark room, only film(that I can do easily in my bathroom) and then I prefer to scan it...
And If you dont like doing what you do, then do something else. You can easily spot if ppl do their doing for love of doing it or just for the fruits it bring. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 14th, 2011|05:14 pm] |
"Unable to resist my eager desire and wanting to see the great (wealth) of the various and strange shapes made by formative nature, and having wandered some distance among gloomy rocks, I came to to the entrance of a great cavern, in front of which I stood some time, astonished and unaware of such a thing. Bending my back into an arch I rested my left hand on my knee and held my right hand over my down-cast and contracted eyebrows: often bending first one way and then the other, to see whether I could discover anything inside, and this being forbidden by the deep darkness within, and after having remained there some time, two contrary emotions arose in me, fear and desire - fear of the threatening dark cavern, desire to see whether there were any marvelous things within it…" Leonardo Da Vinci
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| Empire |
[Aug. 11th, 2011|09:06 pm] |
Rome was so beautiful... |
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| The time of the turning |
[Jun. 16th, 2011|01:57 pm] |
It's the time of turning and there is something stirring outside
It's the time of turning and the old world's falling
Nothing you can do can stop the next emerging
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As another singer sings;
There is something in the air
...
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| Zona |
[Jun. 15th, 2011|12:21 am] |
It is nice to see the same things again, that "luggage" for instance is still at the same place as 2 years ago. I hope it will stay like this till the end of the world. |
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| LIVING THE ALIEN ..=----______== _ |
[May. 24th, 2011|01:42 am] |
So it is. I've been painting. The idea of painting occurred exactly on 22. 3. 2011. I know very well why, but I didnt know why. Some kind of over helming experience set in unnamed house with unnamed person. Nothing really happened, I was just looking around.
I want to see personally if this is just another infatuation or real love. The time for the truth comes always after 3 months, then the pattern usually breaks. Let's see.
Yes, I havent been very much online. I've been much more in atelier and painting and painting, my favorite medium is definitely oil colours. I am not too much in favor of acrylics, I feel oil paint is more alive, more organic, more in the harmony with my blood. So far the experience of paint is pure challenge mixed with joy. It helps me to keep stable and sane. I paint daily as long as I can, usually from -3pm till 2am. Sometimes I skip a day(usually due to exam or some important event like IAMX gig:) ), sometimes two. But two is maximum.
I didnt give up photography, in fact the opposite.
The pic above is unfinished. It looks totally different now. It is 'something' what was haunting me again on Saturday night and it is also autoportrait of some kind.
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